I'm Home, Haven't You Heard?

I'm adjusting.

Talking is still difficult. Either I am entirely silent or I'm blathering on like an idiot. I haven't quite figured out how to have my thoughts in my brain and my thoughts in my mouth at the same time.

The trip made me realize that I really can be an adult. That I have been an adult for a while. Doing it 2000 miles away meant the training wheels were off. That if I screwed up, I had to save myself. Even though I'd been living away from home for 4 or 5 years, it was like I always had a safety net. My parents. My roommates. My friends. In Europe, I had my credit card and a good pair of shoes.

Taking this trip wasn't laziness in action. I wasn't avoiding work. There was more going on than that. If you haven't realized that by now, I don't know why I would bother to explain it.

I expected the Apocalypse. I expected America to shimmer when I got back. Instead, nothing changed. In a way, this was the most relieving outcome. I also expected myself to change. And I really haven't. This is also reliving. My life is still on the same trajectory. The status quo is still standing.

But yeah, this is the end of the blog. My trip is over. I'm still a bit lost in life, but I'm not lost in Europe anymore.

I really could turn this into a work blog. There's so much great material that I know would be fun to write about. But I am pretty sure that I'd get fired. I have no ability to self-censor. I wish someone would write a good blog about being a programmer. I'd probably read it.

By the way, I finally got to see my pictures on my laptop. They are beautiful.